I've been accused of viewing the world through rose-colored glasses, and I do believe in the essential goodness of people, most especially our students at Sage Hill School. Yet recent events have led me to question what leads good kids to make poor choices. Up front, I’ll let you know I don’t have the answers. But I do think there are things we can do as parents, teachers, administrators and as a community to instill moral fortitude and reduce the temptation to cheat.

Here at Sage Hill, we have had an Honor Code in place since 2004 that I believe helps steer our students in the right direction. Created by students, the honor code is printed at the top of many exams, at the teachers’ discretion, and says:

“Face challenges with courage and dignity, the community with respect and dedication, and academics with integrity and honesty: Live honorably.”

But what can we do when students choose not to live honorably? When a Sage Hill student is accused of violating the honor code, they typically go before the Honor Committee, a group of juniors and seniors, two faculty advisors, the Dean of School Life, and the Assistant Head of School as needed. The Honor Committee makes disciplinary recommendations to the Dean of School Life, who then has the option to uphold those recommendations (which is usually the case) or send the recommendation back to the Committee for further reflection and discussion.

Of course, rather than resorting to disciplinary action, we’d like to create an environment where students won’t choose to cheat in the first place. When I was a student, cheating typically took the form of copying someone's assignment or getting ahold of a test. Today, the definition of cheating, and the possible ways to do it, are far more complex. Recent cases in Wisconsin and New York City have involved snapping photos of exams on smartphones and sharing them with students in later classes. Students at a San Jose high school tapped into a computer to steal tests long before the incident at Corona del Mar High School occurred. The focus today on group work has blurred the line between collaboration and cheating. Is it cheating if students help each other on a take-home exam, as occurred in 2012 at Harvard? Is it cheating to help a friend study for a test that you already took earlier in the day?

Statistics on cheating are hard to validate, because they rely (paradoxically!) on students being honest in surveys. But here’s a reliable report that says between 75 and 98% of college students surveyed each year report having cheated in high school. The students most likely to cheat are high achievers as well as struggling students, but not students in the middle. Why would high achievers cheat? I think we all know the answer to that.

The pressure to succeed has never been more intense for students intent on getting into a “good” college. Juggling a full slate of classes and extracurricular activities may leave students feeling overwhelmed and even desperate. Parents, here is where I turn to you for help. First and foremost, expect the best from your children, but refrain from putting undue pressure on them to get certain grades or get into certain colleges. Talk to them about the choices they can make when confronted with the inability to complete an assignment or difficulty reaching their goals on tests. Tell them it is not the end of the world if they don't get a certain grade—and (this may be the hardest part) mean it! Direct them to resources for help—the conference time built into our schedule, our peer counselors, or study groups with their classmates. Encourage them to talk to their teachers if they feel they can’t complete an assignment on time.

We parents (yes, I include myself) also need to model ethical behavior for our children, starting at a very young age. We need to consider the message we send when we buy a child’s ticket for our 13-year-old or cut the carpool line or don’t tell the cashier he gave us too much change.

We can help with the attitude here on campus as well. I heard an interview with “cheating expert” Eric Anderman, a professor of educational psychology at the Ohio State University, in which he said, “When teachers focus on learning and mastery, you get less cheating.” The producer of the documentary “Race to Nowhere,” Vicki Abeles, wrote in a recent Washington Post column, “Until we demonstrate for our children that success lies in the process and not in the product of their work, we will encourage them to cheat.” At Sage Hill, we do try to emphasize the process, not the product. Teachers cringe when students ask, “What’s on the test,” not “What are we learning?” We aim to stimulate intellectual curiosity and build knowledge, and we believe good test scores or well-written papers will naturally follow. Our college counselors try to de-emphasize getting into a “top” college simply because of its rank and prestige, and focus on helping our students find their best fit, the place where they will thrive as a person. We want our students to believe in themselves, to put their best efforts into everything they do, but also to accept that they won’t always be perfect. At Sage Hill and throughout their lives, my hope is that they to choose imperfect but honest over perfectly dishonest every time.